Sunday, March 8, 2009

THE PARABLE OF MORE RIGHTWING JIVE

The rightwing Republicans attacking Obama for current economic circumstances, as well as other aspects of the worldwide decline…

…is like a guy being given a company car to use for a period of time, and it’s in perfect condition, even has some free checkups and free oil changes and so on available, but instead the guy forgets to check the oil, deliberately ignores the oil light flashing, rides the brakes until they’re shot, careens over curbs and parking lot dividers until the shocks are useless and the wheels are drastically out of alignment, fails to replace a fan belt that’s close to snapping…

…and who has friends who want to see company cars eliminated, or at least with much reduced power, so they pour sugar in the gas tank followed by ping pong balls, slam the seat belts in the doors until they’re useless—etc. etc…

…and then the primary user instead of going up the hill to where he got the car heads down and ends up crashing it into a telephone pole so the frame is cracked and close to breaking as are the axles, etc….

…then he’s replaced…

…and when the new guy gets in and maneuvers the car off the telephone poll and starts to drive away and turn the car around, he discovers how trashed it is and while he’s trying to slow down so he can turn it to go back uphill, he finds he can’t because the brakes don’t work and the steering’s off, and then the engine cracks from lack of oil so he has no power except that of gravity pulling the car downhill faster and faster…

…and then the friends of the former driver start blaming the new driver for not turning the car around and heading back up the hill!!!

But there’s more…

…the new driver remains calm and cool, pulls out his cell phone and calls the old driver’s friends and then his own friends to urge them to start building a giant shock absorber, like a huge pile of soft rubber etc. at the bottom of the hill and to have a new engine block ready to replace the old one and mechanics to fix the other problems so that he can have as soft a landing as possible and quickly get the car running properly to turn it around and head back up the hill…

…but the former driver’s friends ridicule this plan aa too expensive, some saying it’s better to do nothing, let the car crash at the bottom and start again with a skateboard, while others say that the best thing to do is to give the old driver and his friends a big tax break…

…and even some of the new driver’s friends are more interested in arguing with the original driver’s’ friends than in uniting to get what the driver says he needs….

…and the media onlookers mostly ring their hands and cry and rant and whine about the possibility of a horrible ending to all this…

…fortunately the driver remains calm and makes other calls and gets some to respond to his requests…

…but will they get it all done in time to save the car?...let alone the new driver…?

3 comments:

harryn said...

i enjoyed that ...

how convenient for the previous driver and his pit[iful] crew to blame the new driver ...

at least there's consistency in absolving themselves of responsibility [my teenage son sometimes has bouts with those kind of delusions]- and even saying now that if they were driving they'd know how to handle it ...

[same as it ever was]

reality is - that the new driver knows he's probably got one good spare tire, a bunch of recyclable material, the will to move up the hill, and reliance on some level-headed, compassionate bystanders ... and that's only if the old pit crew doesn't destroy that too with their futility propaganda ...

does anyone remember the news line "it's the economy, stupid" ...
when real jobs were being replaced with 34 hour per week maximums to avoid eligibility for benefits that later morphed into full time jobs where one wouldn't expect the entitlements of health care and pensions and when hopelessness for graduating high schoolers was replaced with an infusion of juiced up patriotism so the unemployment numbers would be deployed to service and 'volunteerism' with the promise of practical training for a future in a militaristic pre-emptive government trained in law enforcement that could eventually combat violations of the patriot act or similar views held by the party line ...
so now we have a lot of trained combatants de-andrenalizing with no where to go - thank you fox news ...
sometimes it seems like the confederacy was never destroyed - certainly makes a good case for conservatives' seceding and president limbaugh - and let the democracy get back to the business of governing for the people ...

JIm said...

It is amazing how much bullshit is necessary to defend this incompetent and or deliberatively destructive group of politicians. We have had past recessions where tax cuts have quickly and efficiently pulled us out of recessions. We have Communist China following more enlightened tax policy than the out of control tax and spend Pelosi, Reid, Obama three horsemen of the Apocalypse. I have to admit that Bush and Paulson were the forth horseman in their last six months of office. Real damage has been done by the expectations and now the concrete proposals of the Liberals “War on Productive Elements” of the US Economy”. This is all done in order to fulfill the “Liberal Wish List “of the last thirty years. One has to wonder how much more damage they will do.

Butch in Waukegan said...

Co-captains of the Dirigible America, a parable

The big ship has been sailing along for many years.

For the last 15 years things seemed very well, thank you very much. First class passengers were ecstatic and coach had no reason to complain. Steerage? Well, what can you expect?

When did the problem begin? Nobody can say for sure. Maybe it was on Captain D’s watch.

Captain D: “What’s this thing?”

Ensign D: “It’s the flux capacitor, sir.”

Captain D: “Damnit, everybody knows that Captain Bonzo proved that the capacitor only keeps us from going higher. Tear it out and turn up the gas.”

Ensign D: “But, sir, remember when . . .”

Captain D: “ This isn’t he ‘30s, damnit, TURN UP THE GAS.”

Or maybe it was on Captain R’s shift.

Ensign R: “Sir, we’re losing altitude.”

Captain R: “Ugh?”

Ensign R: “Sir, we’re losing altitude. First class is complaining. What should we do?”

Captain R: “Turn up the gas. We’ve got to lose some weight too. You know what to do”

Ensign R: “Aye, aye, sir.” He grabs the intercom. “Steerage? Every third person. Captain’s orders.”

And so we come to today.

Ensigns D and R, in unison: “There’s a rip in the fabric, what do we do? Captains! What do we do? WHAT DO WE DO?”

The captain’s lips are pale and still. Finally, they mutter “more gas, throw more overboard, more gas, more overboard . . .” as the ship steadily drops.